Why This Blog Exists and Who It’s For
This blog is for leaders, professionals, and individuals who understand that their name carries weight. Whether you're a hiring manager, a mentor, a military veteran transitioning to the civilian world, or a professional navigating LinkedIn endorsements, your recommendations shape not only the future of others but also your own credibility.
I wrote this because I’ve personally experienced the highs and lows of lending my name to others. Through my work mentoring young men for scholarships, guiding professionals in career transitions, and reconnecting with former colleagues on LinkedIn, I’ve seen how recommendations can either be a powerful tool for good or a risk to one’s reputation. This blog is meant to help you navigate those waters wisely.
Personal Experiences: When My Name Was on the Line
A Time When Recommendations Paid Off
Recently, I updated my LinkedIn profile and reached out to several former employers and colleagues from my military and civilian career. Their responses were not only positive but detailed and affirming. As I read their endorsements, I found myself wondering, Did I really deserve this? Had I truly made that much of an impact?
Upon reflection, I realized that I had. I had invested time, energy, and dedication into my work, and these recommendations were a reflection of that. It reaffirmed the idea that when you genuinely build relationships and perform with integrity, people will be eager to vouch for you.
When Lending My Name Backfired
However, not every recommendation has gone as planned. My wife and I have both experienced situations where we vouched for someone based on a fair relationship, only for them to squander the opportunity.
One particular case involved an individual who needed a job. I had worked with them before and felt they had the potential to succeed. However, once they got the position, their performance didn’t match my endorsement. They failed to meet deadlines, lacked accountability, and ultimately left the role under negative circumstances.
This incident left me questioning my judgment. It also made me realize that every recommendation is a reflection of who we associate with and who we trust. As a leader, you must be careful—your endorsement is not just about the other person; it’s about your credibility as a decision-maker.
The Responsibility of Recommending Young Men for Opportunities
As a mentor, I take recommendations seriously. I only endorse young men for scholarships, awards, college programs, and fraternities if I’ve had the time to mentor them, understand their work ethic, and see evidence of their commitment.
This is a critical lesson for anyone in a leadership position. Recommendations should not be handed out casually. Instead, they should be earned through demonstrated effort, reliability, and integrity.
The Purpose of Recommendations
Recommendations serve multiple functions in professional and personal development. They can:
Validate a person’s skills, character, and work ethic.
Strengthen a candidate’s application for jobs, scholarships, promotions, or memberships.
Offer insight into a candidate’s integrity and reliability.
Build networks and create opportunities.
According to a study by Granovetter (1973), social networks and professional endorsements significantly impact career mobility, often serving as the deciding factor in hiring decisions. A strong recommendation can be a bridge to success, but a poor or dishonest one can lead to reputational damage.
Types of Recommendations and Their Impact
1. Professional Recommendations (Workplace & LinkedIn Endorsements)
In professional settings, recommendations are often requested for job applications, promotions, or networking opportunities.
These include:
Written letters for employment, graduate school, or military-to-civilian transitions.
LinkedIn endorsements, which act as public testimonials of skills and character.
Word-of-mouth referrals in industry circles.
The challenge? Not all recommendations are equal. Some are genuine testaments to a person’s ability, while others are given out of obligation or courtesy. Employers often question if a recommendation is based on actual performance or mere acquaintance.
2. Academic and Scholarship Recommendations
As someone who mentors young men for scholarships and college programs, I understand the weight of an academic endorsement. Universities and organizations use recommendations to vet applicants beyond their grades and test scores.
A study by Waldeck, Orrego, Plax, and Kearney (1997) suggests that academic recommendations significantly affect admission decisions, but only when they provide substantive, evidence-based insights into a candidate’s character and capabilities. Generic or exaggerated letters often fail to influence decision-makers.
3. Personal and Character References
Character references come into play for memberships, fraternity/sorority applications, and even legal matters. These recommendations often assess honesty, reliability, and leadership. However, they require careful consideration, as a misplaced character reference can damage your credibility.
Best Practices for Giving Recommendations
1. Evaluate Before Endorsing
Before recommending someone, ask:
Have I personally witnessed this person’s work ethic?
Do I have concrete evidence of their character and reliability?
Would I hire this person myself?
2. Be Honest and Specific
Instead of saying, “John is a great worker,” provide evidence:
"John consistently exceeded sales targets by 15% and took initiative in mentoring new hires, demonstrating strong leadership and reliability."
3. When to Say No
It’s okay to decline a recommendation request. A professional way to decline could be:
"I appreciate you reaching out, but I don’t feel I have enough experience working with you to provide a strong recommendation at this time."
4. How to Repair Your Credibility if a Recommendation Backfires
If someone you recommended fails to perform, take proactive steps:
Acknowledge the mistake privately with those impacted.
Strengthen your vetting process moving forward.
Avoid publicly retracting recommendations unless necessary.
5. The Ethics of Recommendations
Is it ethical to recommend someone you don’t know well?
No, it is generally not ethical to recommend someone you do not know well. A recommendation, whether for a job, a scholarship, or professional endorsement, carries an implicit message: I vouch for this person’s abilities, character, and reliability based on my firsthand experience. If you don’t know the individual well enough to make an informed judgment, the recommendation is misleading and can damage your credibility.
However, there may be situations where you can still provide a partial or qualified endorsement. If you have limited interactions with the person but are aware of their reputation or work through trusted sources, you can clarify the nature of your recommendation. For example:
Instead of saying, "I highly recommend John for this role," you could state:
"While I have not worked directly with John, I have heard positive feedback from colleagues and observed his work from a distance. Based on this, he appears to be a strong candidate."
Transparency is key—misrepresenting your relationship with the individual could mislead decision-makers and negatively impact your professional integrity.
Should recommendations be given only based on personal experience?
Ideally, yes—recommendations should be rooted in direct, personal experience. The strongest recommendations provide concrete examples of a candidate’s work ethic, achievements, and reliability. Without firsthand knowledge, the endorsement lacks substance and credibility.
However, there are cases where recommendations based on indirect experience can be justified, provided they are clearly framed. For example:
If a mentor or respected colleague provides you with reliable insights into a candidate’s strengths, you can reference their perspective while making it clear you are relaying secondhand information.
If you have reviewed a candidate’s work (e.g., a portfolio, publications, or case studies) and are confident in their abilities, you may endorse them with appropriate disclaimers.
The key is to avoid vague or exaggerated statements that could mislead decision-makers. If you cannot provide a recommendation grounded in specific examples, it is better to decline than to give a weak or unverified endorsement.
Should there be transparency in disclosing potential biases (e.g., personal friendships)?
Yes, transparency is crucial when making recommendations, especially if there is a personal relationship, financial incentive, or other potential bias. Decision-makers rely on recommendations to assess a candidate’s merit objectively, so undisclosed biases can compromise the integrity of the process.
Best practices for transparency include:
Explicitly stating your relationship: If you are endorsing a friend, former business partner, or family member, mention this upfront. For example:"I have known Sarah for over ten years as both a colleague and a close friend. While I have personal ties to her, I can attest to her professionalism and leadership based on our work together in XYZ projects."
Avoiding overstatement: If your recommendation is influenced by personal loyalty rather than direct evidence of ability, be cautious not to exaggerate their qualifications.
Recusing yourself when necessary: In situations where your relationship with the individual might compromise fairness (e.g., recommending a family member for a promotion in your own company), it may be more ethical to step aside and let others assess the candidate objectively.
By being honest about potential biases, you uphold your credibility and allow decision-makers to weigh the recommendation appropriately.
Final Thoughts: Safeguard Your Credibility
Your name is one of your most valuable assets. Lending it to someone in the form of a recommendation should never be taken lightly. Thoughtful endorsements can open doors for deserving individuals, but careless recommendations can damage your reputation.
In today’s interconnected world, where LinkedIn recommendations and professional referrals hold substantial weight, safeguarding your credibility is essential. Be intentional, be honest, and, above all, ensure that your name remains a trusted symbol of excellence.
Would you reconsider who you endorse moving forward? Let’s discuss in the comments.
References
Goler, L., Gale, J., Harrington, B., & Grant, A. (2016). Why we love referrals—and you should too. Harvard Business Review.
Granovetter, M. (1973). The strength of weak ties. American Journal of Sociology, 78(6), 1360-1380.
Waldeck, J. H., Orrego, V. O., Plax, T. G., & Kearney, P. (1997). Graduate student/faculty advisor mentoring relationships: An exploratory study. Communication Quarterly, 45(3), 93-109.
This is great information. Thank you for sharing!
Informative and insightful. I have fallen prey myself to giving a recommendation, only for the recommendation to backfire, and I didn’t know how to “fix it” professionally. This should be a master class. Great article!
Beautifully written and very useful for the future. As a business owner this information is not only accurate and to the point, it should be included as part of a leadership training manual/class and taught to future leaders of tomorrow!